Tea Party Etiquette

Tea Party Etiquette

Just like the royalty and upper class did in the original tea parties, it is important to use proper etiquette when attending a formal tea party that you have been invited to. Here are a few tea party etiquette tips to remember:

After You Receive the Invite

• Always RSVP.
• Always try to arrive on time.
• Tea parties are a social and elegant event! Most of the time a floral or brightly colored dress is the dress code for women and a suit or trousers and jacket are fitting for men who attend a tea party. Never wear jeans, pants, or all black (dark colors) to a tea party if you are a woman. If the host makes a special request regarding the dress code, honor her wishes. This is also an excuse to wear that summery and dressy large tea hat you have always want to wear! :) What's a tea party without the hats?

• Tea parties are made to catch up and even to do some light-hearted gossip! Come prepared to add to the subjects of conversation. Appropriate examples are social chat, light-hearted conversation, and a break from work and any serious topic of conversation. Politics should never be discussed at a formal tea party.
• Tea parties are more than likely not the best place for children because of the nature of the event and the fine china usually used to dress the party. If your invitation did not specify whether or not there is a setup area or activity for children, always assume that it is an adult only occasion.

                            "Love and scandal are the best sweeteners of tea!" 

                                                        -Henry Fielding

At the Tea Party

• First thing upon your arrival make sure to greet the host.
• If there are place cards on the table, find yours as soon as you get there. You may mix and mingle if the party has not started yet, but it is always a good idea to know where the host wants you to sit.
• If there is a guest of honor, greet him or her and chat for a moment or two, but back away if there is a line of others wanting to chat.
• Make sure to make conversation with every guest at the tea party and not just the people you already know. Tea parties are a social gathering and the host can not do all of the talking. :) Get to know new people and make everyone feel welcomed. That is, in fact, the reason for the party!
• Treat the tea cups and all other china pieces with the utmost respect and care. A lot of the pieces are more than likely collector items, greatly valued, and non-replaceable. Most collector tea cups range from about $40 to over $3,000.

• Hold the handle of the teacup using your thumb and your first one or two fingers. There is no need to stick out your pinky; this is an exaggeration of how people sometimes tilt their pinky upwards to balance the cup. Do not loop your fingers through the teacup handle or cradle the side or bottom of the cup with your hands.
• Take small, quiet sips of your tea. Do not blow on the tea if it is too hot. Just place your cup down on the saucer, chit chat, and wait for it to cool to a drinkable temperature. This is more lady like!
• When you are not drinking tea, place the cup on the saucer.
• If you like to have milk in your tea, add it to the teacup before the tea is poured. Also, do not use lemon in your tea if you are also using milk to avoid curdling of the milk.
• Make sure to place the napkin in your lap and never on the table; if you leave the table put the napkin in your seat.
• It is fine to eat most of the foods with your fingers, taking small bites; however, use a fork when trying to eat trickier foods.
• Leave when the party starts to wind down. Always say goodbye to the host and the guest of honor before you leave.